How to Calm First Date Nerves

"Will he laugh at my jokes?" "Am I smart enough for her?" "Is she going to be bored talking to me?" "Am I attractive enough for him?"


Are these the kind of questions that run through your head on a first date? You're not alone. First date anxiety is common in women and men alike. Some of the most common date-inducing anxiety comes from us worrying our date won't like us. This person chose to go on a date with you for a reason...maybe she thought you were attractive, maybe he thought the answers to your profile questions were witty and made him laugh. Whatever it may be think positive, and follow these tips for easing your nerves on a first date.


1. Practice makes perfect. Practice striking up conversations in your daily life with people you normally wouldn't. Checking out at the grocery store? Ask the cashier how her days going. Someone holds the door for you at the coffee shop? Look them in the eye, thank them, and wish them a nice day. Riding in the elevator with a coworker you've never met? Introduce yourself! Repeated exposure to situations that make you feel nervous will ease your fears and make you more comfortable, and conversation is no different. 

2. Fake it until you make it. Confidence is key, and even if you don't feel confidence, you can at least look the part. Wear clothes that make you feel attractive, sit up straight, and make good eye contact with your date. 

3. Use what you know about your date to your advantage. Reread your dates profile a few hours before you meet, that way their likes/dislikes are fresh in your mind, and you have some conversation starters. Been to her favorite restaurant? Seen his favorite movie? Did she list a hobby you two share? Did he list one you know nothing about? These are all safe, lighthearted topics that make great first date conversation. 

4. Take a deep breath! Nervousness is good, as it means that you care what your date thinks of you. If you don't care whether they love you or hate you, what's the point of being there? 

However the first date goes, don't punish yourself or dwell on it. Even if the date ends up in disaster, you'll at least have some practice, and maybe even a funny story to share with your friends. 

How do you ease first date nerves? What's the most nervous you've ever been before a date? Have you used any of the above tips before a date?

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